Egg Man Lyrics

(Beastie Boys/Dust Bros.)

     Agh yea...
     I looked out the window and seen his bald head
     Ran to the fridge and pulled out an egg
     Scoped him with my scopes he had no hair
     Launched that shot and he was caught out there
     Saw the convertible driving by
     Loaded up the slingshot and let one fly
     He went for his to find he didn't have one
     Put him in check correct with my egg gun
     The egg a symbol of life
     Go inside your house and bust out your wife
     I pulled out the jammy he thought it was a joke
     The trigger I pulled his face the yoke
     Reached in his pocket took all his cash
     Left my man standing with an egg moustache
     Suckers they come a dime a dozen
     When I say dozen you know what I'm talking about boy...
     Yea that's right...
     I'm the Egg Man...
     Driving around
     King of the town
     Yea...
     Always got my windows rolled down
     Ready to throw
     You know I'm the Egg Man...
     Once upon a time
     Egg Man...
     Humpty Dumpty was a big fat egg
     He was playing the wall then he broke his leg
     Tossed it out the window three minutes hot
     Hit the Rastaman he said *bloodclot*
     Which came first the chicken or the egg
     I egged the chicken then I ate his leg
     Riding the trains in between cars
     When I pull out the station *you're gonna get yours*
     Drive by eggings plaguing L.A.
     *Yo they just got my little cousin ese*
     Sometimes hard boiled sometimes runny Ray
     Comes from a chicken not a bunny dummy
     People laugh, it's no joke
     My name's Yauch and I'm throwing the yoke
     *Now they got me in a cell* but I don't care
     It was then that I caught catching people out there
     Up on the roof, In my car
     Up all night
     I'm going through science like Dolemite
     The Mack, Who
     I'm the Egg Man, taxi driver...
     I'm the Egg Man
     Egg Man Egg Man
     We all dressed in black we snuck up around the back
     We began to attack the eggs did crack on Haze's back
     Sam I am down with the program
     Green eggs and ham Yosemite Sam
     Come Halloween you know I come strapped
     I throw it at a sucker K-pap
     You made the mistake and judge a man by his race
     You go through life with egg on your face
     Woke up in the morning peculiar feeling
     Looked up and saw egg dripping from the ceiling
     Families puck rocks the businessman
     I'll dog anybody with an egg in my hand
     Not like the crack that you put in a pipe
     But crack on your forehead here's a towel now wipe
     Egg Man, Egg Man Egg Man...